The Epic Demolishing Of Meghan McCain

The Dodgers' season is over (at least we went out on a win), and so that means a return to quiet nights at the ranch, with the occasional rooting for the Hawkeyes and Falcons. So, I have to hit up The Right Scoop, Cubachi and The Real Mir Cat for blog fodder, and boy did they deliver today! By popular demand, I now give you the deconstruction of Meghan McCain's (hereafter known as Meggie Mac, per Allahpundit) piece, "My Palin Problem." I am only doing one paragraph from the excerpt at Hot Air as a consideration to my poor, long-suffering readers. Here we go!

Everyone knows there is a media obsession with Sarah Palin, but I don’t know if everyone has quite realized that the obsession has become a fetishization.

Meggie Mac graduated from Columbia University with a bachelor's in Art History. This means that at some point, she took an English class. In this class, they would have taught her that if you want to be taken seriously as a published author, you should use words from the Oxford English Dictionary, Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, Encarta, or another respected dictionary. All of the dictionaries I've listed are available at onelook.com. That is where I found out that the word "fetishization" does not exist in the dictionaries Meggie Mac's professors would have recommended, but in 5 online slang dictionaries. Even if "fetishization" was a word, she's using it wrong. A rewrite of this sentence would be: "The media's obsession with Sarah Palin is obvious, but I am unsure if people have realized that the obsession has become a fetish."

The further I got into my book tour last month, the more paranoia set in as I started questioning the idea that the only thing that made me interesting to some people was my association with Sarah Palin.

As an editor, you learn quickly not to tear your hair out when looking at sentences such as these. People look at you funny if you have bald spots where you used to have long hair. I would have sent this piece back to the writer, demanding a rewrite before I accepted any more submissions. Let's move on before I go bald, shall we?

After dropping the "fetishization" bomb, Meggie Mac does not back up her use of that word with appropriate evidence. She steamrolls on to her own "paranoia" that the only reason people pay attention to her is that she was associated (albeit briefly) with Sarah Palin. What a surprise that people would want to know more about a governor and vice-presidential candidate who is changing the political landscape than a narcissistic 25-year-old hanging on to her father's political coattails! But I'm getting ahead of myself here. This sentence, if Meggie Mac wanted to retain her dignity, should read: "As I got further into my book tour last month, I began wondering if the only reason I was interesting to some people was my association with Sarah Palin."

Sarah Palin, not my father John McCain.

Flashing red lights. Loud honking noises. Kitties running for cover. These are all signs that my "Fragment!" alert has gone off for this sentence. Aside from the pouting tone that comes through even in these six words, there's not much else to deconstruct, because... it's a misplaced fragment. So, let's revise: "As I got further into my book tour last month, I began wondering if the only reason I was interesting to some people was my association with Sarah Palin, not my father John McCain."

And for that fact, it seems that the only thing that gets any kind of major media attention when it comes to women in politics is either Sarah Palin or her numerous impersonators.

Here Meggie Mac does not refer to a "fact," but a suspicion of hers. I think the phrase she was looking for was "for that matter," which I would have struck from the sentence entirely to try for a more serious, professional tone. The combination of the words "only," "either," and "or" in the same sentence makes me cringe. Also, there was plenty of media attention when Nancy Pelosi became the first woman Speaker of the House of Representatives in 2007. Meggie Mac may claim she's too young to remember the media proclaiming 1992 "The Year Of The Woman" as several Democratic women won Senate seats, but I'm five months younger than this daughter of a national politician and I remember it. I'm going to change the plain "women" to "Republican women," because the women on the Democratic side are getting plenty of attention, and it's not pretty. I think a better word for what Meggie Mac is trying to describe would be "copies," not "impersonators." An impersonator would try to look exactly like Sarah Palin and try convince people she was the real deal. In other words, Tina Fey. Let's bring this suffering sentence to a better place. "It seems that Sarah Palin and her numerous copies are the main focus of media attention when it comes to Republican women in politics."

These are the people that are creating and dominating the political narrative for women in this country.

Is Meggie Mac referring to the media or the Sarah Palin "impersonators" here? I'm leaning toward the "impersonators," but it is ambiguous enough to make my red pen hover over this sentence. Now, I am not arguing that Sarah Palin or the women who she's inspired don't make headlines. But Meggie Mac seems to suggest, once again, that no women were on the national political scene before Sarah Palin showed up. If that were the case, wouldn't someone like Meggie Mac be singing her praises? But that's not Meggie Mac's problem. It's Sarah Palin herself, and the horror of more people like her. The whining and disdainful tone of this sentence almost makes me want to erase this post and leave the internet forever. But someone has to stand up for mature, grammatically correct discourse online. The best revision that matches my previous ones that I can come up with is: "This attention has dominated today's political narrative of Republican women."

In the Nashville airport in the midst of my book tour, I picked up the recent “Mama Grizzlies” cover of Newsweek which asks this very question. Why are only women like Sarah Palin getting nominated for elected office and receiving all of the media attention?

As long as you didn't actually buy it, Meggie, I'll consider calling off the air strike. Surprisingly, the first sentence could almost be left as is. Except that the last part, if it weren't for the next sentence, would imply that the previous sentence had asked a question (it didn't). Once again, someone should be handing me some cheese to go with all this whine. I'm trying not to encourage a run-on sentence here, but the best revision I can think of is: "While in the Nashville airport on my book tour, I picked up the recent Newsweek that featured the 'Mama Grizzlies' cover which asked this question: 'Why are only women like Sarah Palin getting nominated for Republican elected office and receiving all of the media's attention?'"

This is the question that has been plaguing me since the release of my book.

Here's a hint, Meggie Mac: Don't use the word "plaguing" when whining about someone else's media attention. It only conjures up negative images in people's minds about you, which I assume is not optimal. I could be wrong on that one, but it's best to err on the side of caution. The Black Beast of Ammmmmmmbiguous rears its ugly head again, and it is up to me to slay it. (Here I don my husband's +20 Shirt of Smiting!) Is the question that she's referenced in the last three sentences "Why are these women getting attention?" or "Why am I not getting any attention?" Given her accusation near the beginning of the paragraph that some people only were interested in her association with Sarah Palin, it's a mystery which "question" she is talking about here. With what I know of Meggie Mac's personality, along with the tone and title of this piece, I am going to say that the question is, "Why is Sarah Palin getting all the attention and not me?" I can see why that would trouble you, Meggie. Let's be merciful, and attempt to elevate this piece: "The question that Newsweek posed has been troubling me ever since I released my book."

If you've reached the end of this piece, you may gladly join me in consuming copious amounts of "adult beverages," as Rush likes to call them. You also have my gratitude for sticking with me this long. I apologize for the epic nature of this post, but you all know my sense of duty would permit me to do no less.

Edit: Apparently the Internal Affairs Bureau of the Grammar Police takes exception to my drafting methods, so two mistakes have been corrected.